I know I am very late but a few weeks ago, I watched that great theological film ‘The Pursuit of Happyness’. The synposis reads as follows:

Will Smith stars in this moving tale inspired by a true story of Chris Gardner, a San Francisco salesman who’s struggling to make ends meet. When his girlfriend Linda (Thandie Newton) walks out, Chris is left to raise their 5-year old son Christopher (Jaden Smith) on his own. Chris’ determination finally pays off when he lands an unpaid internship in a brutally competitive stockbroker-training program, where only twenty interns will make the cut. But without a salary, Chris and his son are evicted from their apartment and are forced to sleep on the streets, in homeless shelters and even behind the locked doors of a metro station bathroom. With self confidence and the love and trust of his son, Chris Gardner rises above his obstacles to become a Wall Street legend.

I absolutely loved the film. For some reason though at certain points, I’m sure someone brought some onions in the room because my eyes were watering 😉

As a father who does not live with his children but lives for his children, the film struck a chord with me and made me realise how my kids are my world. I understand that my ultimate goal for them is to point them to Christ so that they can receive salvation. I am still grateful for the parenting course that I attended at my church. However I realise that that no matter how good a parent you are, there is still no guarantee that your children will turn out to be angels because of their sinful nature. I mean who is the best ‘parent’ around? Isnt it God and look how we are. Disobedient and rebellious. So parents, don’t always keep beating yourself up if your children go off the rails even though you have trained them up in the ways of the Lord.

At the moment, myself and my soon to be 15 year old daughter are not on the best of terms and she has decided not to stay with me for two weeks during the summer holidays so it is just me and my son. I am asking God for wisdom in dealing with this situation as its not nice and it’s very awkward at the moment.

For me, I never under-estimate how important the job of a parent is, especially in the early years and like Chris Gardner in the film, I want my children growing up knowing that I did everything possible as a parent to give them the best in life in every way and that includes spiritually

  1. wickle says:

    If it makes you feel any better, I still haven’t seen that movie … I keep meaning to …

    I will, by the way, pray for the situation with your daughter. Times like that will happen, and it’s not easy. My own sons are 10 and about-to-be-12, I’m sure that I’ll have a summer or two like this sometime in the future.

    Anyway … Thanks for the review. I think I will go borrow that movie.

    And thanks for the encouragement and the reminder about what it is to be a father.

    Keep up the good work.

  2. Carlotta says:

    Alan, my two daughters both 21 and 23 now, had little to do with their dad after I divorced him when they were only 3 and 5. When they were teens, all they cared about was hanging around home because of their activities and friends.

    But after they turned 18, their interest in their father returned and now it was so important for them to seek his approval, advice and etc. The older daughter more so, but my younger daughter who was pretty quiet and never seemed to crave father’s attention as much as older sister’s, expressed joy to find out that her dad was driving her to college later this month. (We’re in San Diego and she’s going to San Francisco to school).

    She was getting her time with dad and it means the world to her now!

    All this to say, don’t despair. Daughter’s are peculiar but they do love their dads! Even the ones whose fathers have had no desire to spend time with them when they were small as my girls father.

    Hopefully your daughter’s mother isn’t speaking ill of you and turning her against you. I always encouraged my kids to love their father – regardless of how bad I talked about him! (I know what the psychologist said..but hey, sometimes the truth had to be spoken!) And that worked. They kept no ill towards except for his part in breaking up the family.

    I saw that movie and I boo hooed so much because I was feeling, why couldn’t my children’s father love them like that! And sacrifice for them like that! I was so happy to see how much this man loved his son. That was a great movie!

  3. Alan Higgins says:

    Carlotta, thankyou so much for your words. They have been very encouraging and have helped me a lot. Thankyou again

  4. Seeker of truth says:

    Hello Brother Alan, Although I don`t know you, I can sense through your writings that you are a kind ,caring and compassionate Man of God. I too have a 17 year old son who does not live with me(more than 13 years) (and 3 that do). I can only say, because of God`s grace ,this kids adores me despite the slur campaign of his mother. Like you, I continuously try to model Christ love to my kids. I also continue to pray and believe that God will save his mother and her husband. I pray that God`s perfect will be done in every area of your life. Stay encouraged in the lord. Tarre Stanley

  5. Alan Higgins says:

    The same goes to you Seeker of truth. Like you I am constantly praying for their mother and her other half as they are not christians and are surrounded by non christian behaviour. Your words have definitely encouraged me. Thanks for the comforting words

  6. Isaiah says:


    I am not a parent but saw that film some time ago and cried buckets.

    Didn’t know that you had a daughter and son, and I’ll keep all of you in my prayers.

    The Lord bless and keep you, brother.

  7. Alan Higgins says:

    Thanks Isaiah

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